And some mornings are just like this...

We've had a tough time with Lilah in the church nursery on Wednesday nights. It's her fussy time if she isn't with me and her nonstop crying in the nursery made me fear that I would have to quit my Bible study. I couldn't concentrate in class knowing she was upstairs crying. Others let me know that she would get past it and to carry on but I was pretty sure I couldn't let her "cry it out" week after week. I took last week off and have prayed HEAVILY about this situation. Last night we got to the church for supper at 4:45pm (very early!). We ate, I took Lilah to a vacant nursery room, fed her, changed her, rocked her to sleep, swaddled her and delivered her to her teachers peacefully with 20 minutes to spare (yes!). I did sneak by the nursery about five times in that 20 min to see if I heard any screaming (I didn't) and during my break from class (no crying). Success! Two hours, no screaming. This was a big deal to me folks.
A church member joked, "Ha! Now she'll be up all night."

Nah.

Well kinda.

She was up between 3a-5a. Well, not up but I laid her beside me so that maybe I could get some rest while she worked out her wiggles and it went on for two hours this way: Quiet, paci falls out, "sqawk!", paci in, quiet, arms flail, paci out, "grunt!", paci in...you get the picture.

Then at 7:08am I wake with a start realizing we've overslept.

To the girls room and rush, rush, rush we get ready.

And it is at that point I realize little girl has drawn (with marker) on her new headband/bow. This is a big deal because...
Anything that detaches form LG's body can cause her problems (trouble) in school (bows, ribbons, shoestrings, belts...you name it). These detachable items however are fun things. Things that we wish she could wear but are wary of because we want to do our best to keep her out of trouble. BUT yesterday I had let her wear her new headband because it was a birthday gift from GG. It was her trial run and she promised me she would not take it off of her head.
And then I find that not only did she take it off but she drew on it (big spot!) with red magic marker on purpose (although this did happen at church and not at school to her credit). This, my friends, is my middle child. This is the kind of thing that she does that just perplexes me and breaks me inside because I want so much for her to make the right decisions and it's so frustrating when she doesn't. And honestly, I think she WANTS to make the right decision, it's like she's just incapable of stopping her impulses sometimes.
And so, this morning that is already off to a bad start gets even worse because her father has to get involved to discipline her. I don't know about you but I like nothing less than sending a child off to school after a bad morning at home. It just feels yucky inside.

So that's where we are at 8:51 this morning. Feeling a little defeated already but it has to get better, right? Some mornings are just like this.
This post needs some happy so I'll give you a little of that too...

Miss Sassy Pants shaking it in our front yard in what she believes is THE most beautiful outfit a seven-year-old could hope to find herself in (taking part in picking out clothes this year means that this skirt is worn weekly by one of the two big girls...thank goodness the school says only tennis shoes are allowed at school or I can guarantee we'd have these bad boys on every day).



Most mornings are much more like this with sleepy-eyed, smiling faces looking back at me. This is why it is usually my favorite time of the day. Everyone looking so sweet, myself with renewed energy and the promise of a new day full of possibility.


We'll say to little girl tonight as we tuck her in (as we always do when there is big trouble that day), "Everyday is a new day."
A chance to start over.