They are my kids. Plain and simple. And just like it may be hard to imagine that your child would ever have been in the custody of DHR, sitting at desks all day waiting for a place to go, with clothes too large, wompy hair-cuts and bruises where they don't belong...it's also hard for me now to imagine that that was once my children. But it was.
This may make me sound like a looney toon, but I can remember after Lilah was born I would catch myself thinking, "Was she adopted or were they?" I know this sounds crazy but it's true. I had just pushed a child out of my body but I couldn't differentiate one from another. It's the same. No matter how they came to me, they are all the same in my heart and mind.
I've learned alot over the last two years. It hasn't been the glorified version that maybe we all expect parenting to be. It's been the real version. It's taught me alot about myself. My true colors. Jonathan and I are learning as we go and always striving to be the best parents we can be. These girls (all three of them) are what I have always desired from life. I can only hope that Lilah will grow up to be as sweet and loving as her sisters are.
They have shown me what life is all about. They make me laugh alot. They've made me want to pull my hair out at times. They fill our house with chaos and noise and love. Most of all, they show me over and over again what God's love must look like. They are so quick to accept, so quick to forgive, and so willing and eager to love and be loved.
My prayers today are of thanksgiving but also for the families and children both in our nation and throughout the world who are waiting and praying and searching for one another. What a blessing adoption is!
3 comments:
Wow! 2 years? What a sweet post. I can relate so much to what you were saying. When people that I haven't seen in a while see me with Peyton and ask me about having ANOTHER baby. It takes me a minute to even remember I didn't birth him. It's crazy and I don't understand it but he is such a part of me..he's just mine. It doesn't matter how they come to us, whether in our heart or womb, they are still OURS. My birth children were in my womb for 9 months each and my foster/adopt children were in my heart for 25 years (from the age of 13 when God called me to minister to foster children). Both are such miracles and blessings. Aren't we blessed to have been called to adopt? If only more people understood what an incredible gift and blessing adoption is and would answer the call to adopt.
Happy Gotcha Day to your sweet girls! They are so adorable and always look soooo happy...deep down truly happy!
Jess, I too remember exactly where I stood two years ago when I got the call from you that you were heading to DHR to meet the girls.. The same feeling that I had when Ella and Lilah were on the way!! I can say as a grandmother that there is no difference in my heart for any of my girls. Its like we have always had them, isn't it? And I asked Sam on Gotcha day... "do you remember the day that you first came to live with mommy and daddy" She said "no." They just remember always being here. And they are truly such happy, happy little girls!! Just as they have taught you so much about life and love and yourself..... you have done the same for me. I love you all, GG
Happy Gotcha Day! What a special post. We are all so blessed to have the girls in our lives. I just love that our girls are so close and love each other so much!
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